I had quite a melancholy evening, focusing on all the stuff I can't seem to do right, like knit the shawl TI and I are supposed to be starting, finish a crossword puzzle, or write a damn thesis paper. And of course, thoughts like that inevitably lead to: What good am I anyway? Why can't I do anything useful like, say, CPR? What's the point of all this anyway?
And that, my friend, is much too much deep thought for the night before I'm going back to work to face 100s of unread emails and some sort of big mistake made by someone (possibly me) that my boss alluded to in a vague email. Yikes. At least Bug, sensing my pending psychosis, is letting the dog sleep with us tonight.
6 comments:
I think that we're coordinating our meltdowns perfectly, as you have captured my current (read: as of this morning) so well. I told R this morning that I feel like I'm completely useless and I don't know what I'm doing. Picking up Birch right now seems like a big mistake!
I can't even imagine you feeling this way, so it is helpful to know that I am in such good company. :)
Hang in there, Bug. Hope your re-entry into work is relatively painless.
One day at a time, one crisis at a time...write your way though it. : )
Wow, my perceptions of you are so far from you freaking out. I mean, I've actually seen you get a bit upset (a little tiny glimpse during the first residency) but my idea of you is that you area a calm well-composed person next to flailing spazzes like myself. I guess I will learn a lot from reading your blog. :)
I'm now anticipating a meltdown myself. Hell, if you all are...
I have to get ready for some vistiors first. Uggghh don't want to be entertaining when I can't seem to even get any writing done.
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