What if I hadn't decided, somewhat on a whim, to apply to Lesley's MFA program? What if I hadn't gone to the Ann Lammott reading on a snowy night in a church downtown, where I met the friend who ended up introducing me to the neighborhood in which I now live? What if...
When I was younger, I used to think that any changes to the major decisions in my life would lead me down a path to becoming a totally different person. Now, I think that despite the fact that every decision impacts the course of one's life, I'd be the same person with similar worries and goals no matter which road I chose.
10 comments:
Oddly enough, my feeling is just the opposite of yours. When I was younger, I didn't worry about the impact of my decisions nearly as much as I do now, thinking they wouldn't effect the kind of person I became. But because of some of the decisions I've made, I think I have become a different person than I might have been (and those were mostly positive changes for me). Maybe they would have happened anyway, because I do think we are led to the things that help us grow, if we're open enough to see them.
Very philosophical for a Saturday~and aren't you supposed to be at at BBQ this weekend (instead of waxing so poetically on Sunday Scribblings)???
I agree with you that decisions we make do not alter who we are, although they might change the path we walk - and we might find it difficult to detour from that path, once embarked upon.
I never thought that I may be the same person no matter what roads I choose. Interesting perspective.
Hmmmm ... you've really given me something to ponder.
You know, I reached a similar conclusion yesterday as I wrote my pages...in spite of my experiences, I think certain aspects of my personality would be the same, despite everything. I denied my desire to write for YEARS, and yet if I look back, I can see myself inching towards it so clearly.
I like how you put it though...might give me some respite from decision-phobia.
Lovely post.
Probably...
I think I agree.
I like this post. It's interesting because, in the end, you do seem to believe in destiny about some things.
I just saw the movie "Premonition" and it lead to a discussion of destiny. I believe we change from our choices and our future is in constant motion.
Enjoy your BBQ!
Decisions do not change us at all. But they can change our life.
Interesting comments. Thanks everyone. TI, you raise an interesting point--I think the distingsion I make is that I don't think people are destined to meet certain people/do certain things, but I think that people are inherently certain ways from birth/childhood.
Funny you should write about this. D & I have been talking lately about how you are the same person deep down, no matter what you do in life to try to deny that. We've both found that we have eventually reverted back to our original selves- closer to who we were as children these days. Hmmm.
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