Dear Friends: The low-lights of the year

As promised, here is my sarcastic, always-look-on-the-dull side anti-Christmas letter.

I'm finding this letter hard to write, not because I had a perfect year filled only with happy, pride-inducing moments, but because it's part of my flawed psychological make up to bury the less-than-happy memories in hopes that I can pretend they never happened. Hence the years and years of therapy.

From said therapy, I can tell you this flaw is all my parents' fault. In fact, one of the low-lights of the year came in the days after Thanksgiving, when my family stayed with us. In true Bug-family style, no one talked about anything that was bothering them until my parents decided to leave early, giving no reason why (and of course I didn't ask for one, not only because that would truly go against our nature, but also because I didn't want to make them thing I didn't want them to go).

So now B and I are very much looking forward to spending Christmas with them! B is especially excited about the fights being with them will bring up between the two of us, because you know it's awesome to have to pretend you're totally happy with one another because your in-laws are watching your every move.

Speaking of in-laws, B's family has had a spate of bad luck this year: two elderly grandparents are hospitalized and don't seem to be getting any better, a middle-aged uncle got diagnosed with cancer and died about 2 weeks later, and my step-father also just received a cancer diagnosis. The guilt we felt about not spending Christmas with B's family? Now quadrupled.

On my own health front, I spent all of November and part of October battling a bug that made me exhausted and achy. Then, just as that cleared, I got a bout of chronic headaches that strike everyday between 1 and 2 p.m. They're so precise I don't even need a watch! Talking with my doctor to figure out if they're migraine or tension headaches, but either way, headaches are one of those poorly understood conditions that call for lots of trial and error. So I see lots of doctor's appointments in my future. It'll be a good excuse to get to know my doctor better.

B has also had a list of illnesses (chronic and acute) that I won't go into here lest I breach his privacy. But let's just say it's a long and varied list, much longer say, than the list of things I want for Christmas. Fun!

Now that health and the families are covered, we can move on to the low-lights of my writing life. They mostly consist of the pile of rejection letters housed in my desk drawer--a new one just added to the pile days ago! What a nice surprise to see a SASE in my handwriting amidst the cheery green and red envelopes in my mailbox. I couldn't wait to open it to find out who had rejected me now. (An anthology of stories about baseball, if you must know.)

We also added an insanely difficult-to-train dog to our little family. Nothing like a dog that constantly, and I mean CONSTANTLY, needs attention/reassurance to annoy the crap out of you. And speaking of crap--he's also been difficult to potty train! And our other dog has developed the wonderful ability to grab food off of the counter no matter how far back you place it/what kind of security system you set up. Say bye-bye to lots of "cooling" Christmas cookies...

I think that covers most of 2009. Looking forward to learning what will ail me, my family, and the world in the New Year.

Dear Friends

I know the Christmas Letter is the butt of many, many jokes. But truth be told, I like getting these letters tucked into holiday cards, especially when they're from friends and family I don't talk to all that often.

The letters provide a little peak into their world, kind of like Facebook status updates do. Of course, the letter (and Facebook) generally just highlights, well, the highlights of the year. Rarely do you hear about the minor and major heartbreaks that hit us all day to day. And rarely does a Facebook status update--or a week of status updates--really capture the gritty part of a person's life.

I understand why this is--people are much more comfortable sharing happy news with a large number of people who they don't talk to in their every day lives. Sharing miseries and misfortunes is much more intimate, and therefore shared for those friends and loved ones who are in our day-to-day lives, not those who are in our virtual world or on our Christmas card lists.

But something gets lost, too, when we share only the sweet things in life. We don't allow ourselves to be truly known, and we also perpetuate the myth that bad things don't happen to everyone. Then when we ourselves are going through a hard time, we look at all the "happy" people around us and feel that much more alone.

So wouldn't it be fun if we shared an anti-Christmas letter, featuring only the low-lights of the year? Me thinks it would. I'll post mine in the next day or so. If you're so inclined, please do the same.

Christmas Meme

Thanks to Kim G. for passing this along!

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Either is fine with me!
2. Real tree or artificial? Real, definitely.
3. Eggnog, hot chocolate or apple cider? Eggnog grosses me out, just the name--bleh! (They should rename that, like they're calling prunes dried plumes now to make them seem more palatable.) But I love hot cocoa, even though it makes me break out. Apple cider is good too, though I associate that more with late fall.
4. Favorite gift as a child? Hmm. I don't remember too many of the gifts I got early on, but I do remember an electronic cat that my Oma got me. It would move around when you clapped, and it purred when you pet it.
5. Nativity Scene? Yup, we have a few, though we're not religious.
6. Hardest person to buy for? I'd say my lil brother. He lives in AZ so I don't see him much so it's hard to know what he has and doesn't. I usually go the gift card route with him, though I hate doing that.
7. Mail or email Christmas cards? Mail - but only to people who I won't see around the holidays.
8. Worst gift received? Can't think of one. I'm pretty easy to please. I guess if you pressed me I'd say one of the 5 sweaters I got from various in-laws last year. How many sweaters could one person need?
9. Favorite Christmas movie? I love the Grinch and Charlie Brown, and I crack up at A Christmas Story everytime I see it.
10. When do you start shopping for Christmas? I pretty much spread it throughout the year, though I do most of it post-Thanksgiving.
11. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Sure!
12. Favorite thing to eat? Everything!
13. Clear or colored lights? Clear, though I kinda want to spice it up next year and add some color
14. Outside lights? Just on our front windows
15. Favorite Christmas Song? This year it's that duet, Baby it's Cold Outside. So cute!
16. Travel or stay home? We usually do a little bit of both, to see B's family, which is local, and mine which is in NY. If at all possible, I like to be home Christmas morning.
17. Angel on top of tree or star? Star
18. Open presents Christmas Eve or Christmas morning? Growing up it was one on Christmas eve and the rest on Christmas morning. But that switched as we got older and my older brother liked to sleep in until noon, and me and my little brother liked to get up early. Then Steven opened most of his gifts at night and now we've morphed into doing most of the gifts that night. But when we're here, it's all about Christmas morning.
19. Favorite ornament theme or color? I love an eclectic tree with ornaments from our childhood.
20. Favorite Christmas Dinner? Maybe Italian food? Though I really just like food, in general. :)
21. What do you want for Christmas this year? Nothing in particular. I'm blessed with a husband who is an amazing gift giver, so I'm always delighted.

Merry Christmas!