Reality vs. residency

I'm taking a break from my "lessons" series to wonder aloud (or in type, I guess) whether I'm the only one who feels slightly paralyzed after residency. I learn so much each time I go, and I'm so excited to get to my work, but then reality sets in. First drafts are hard! And messy! I think during my week o' learning, I expect some lesson to come and cure the first draft craziness. It also is frustrating to know that you know more than you're able to get down on the page during a first draft that has to go to your mentor (especially when you are slightly enamored with your new mentor and you don't want to make an ass out of yourself in front of him). I guess the moral of this post is that no matter how many epiphanies I have, the process doesn't get easier. Sigh....

TGI Monday?

Another Sunday feeling out of sorts. Not sure what the problem is this time, but figured I'd post and see if that helps. FC and I had a nice writing date yesterday at Panera (great soup, difficult place to find!). I got out a very shitty first draft of my story.

Maybe that started my angst. First drafts are always so hard. I know in my head that I need to just get it out, but it's so hard not to be uber critical of myself at that stage, questioning what the hell the point of the story is, what the hell I'm trying to do writing in the first place.

Add that to the fact that my pain in the arse neighbors had a loud party last night while I was trying to spend a quiet evening at home, and you have one out-of-sorts Bug. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. I can't believe I'm looking forward to Monday.